Dear Annie,
it has been a while. life got crazy as it usually does, I got busy as I usually do, and I have not read anything in your book in a couple months.
However, I wanted to update you (or really whoever is reading this haha) on some things.
My whole life I have been stuck in a perpetual rut of exhaustion, stress, guilt, abuse, shame, and deep depression. I have found comfort in God and sometimes in others. I have prayed for about 7 years to get out of this rut and I am finally there. God opened a door for me to remove myself from a situation that perpetuated and created those things. My life still has stress in it, but it is not everywhere I go. I have my own place now, and it is a place of peace and delight and freedom. I cannot say how thankful I am to God for answering my prayer from those 7 years.
I finally understand why people have time to read, and make dinner, and eat slowly, and enjoy company because I have the time now too. I am still busy and have things to do, but I don't have things or people to take care of literally 24/7. (I am not even exaggerating.) I feel like I can finally breathe.
I have been out of that situation for a month exactly tomorrow, and so many things are changing inside me. I am learning so much about who I am, and who I want to be, and about Gods peace. I am also learning that my years of struggle to find time to read the Bible and read about God, is coming to an end, and I am so excited for this adventure that I am starting. I am a little scared because there are things that may change that I don't want to change, but I am also confident that God will eventually work all things out for good.
So Annie, and readers, I have a request: pray for me. Pray that I will seek out God and who He is, that I will learn and take hold of who I am in Him and never let go. Pray for my family. Pray that they will cling to God and that the situation they/we are in will be resolved! Pray that wherever I go in my life, in my walk with the Lord that people will see Jesus in me. That they will know that His love exists and it exists in me. Pray that I will never give that up for anyone or anything.
Abba Father, Thank you so much for the time I have spent in crisis and stress. thank you for who I was and how You have changed me through those things. God, I pray for the people reading this letter, that you would make us a community in spirit, that you would use us to spread your good news through sharing our lives and sharing you. Lord, I pray that you would give each person hope that whatever hardship they are going through, whether it takes a day a week, or a decade, you will use it for good. I ask for the people who are in a calm place, that you would show them who you are, that you would ignite a passion for you inside their soul and they would become a megaphone for you in this calm part of their life. That they would not be complacent and sit quietly, but that they would use this time to serve you by serving others. Lord may you be glorified in all we do, and may your life and light shine through our faces and actions!
Lord we ask these things in your name, under the covering of your blood! Amen.
